The Monday Melange 05.30.11: Dan Adler, Harold Camping, Fred Phelps

–Aloysius, our Executive Director of Sports Information here at Everyone’s Entitled to Joe’s Opinion, is not very big into politics.  After all, he is a bear, and he is a sports fan.  And he is the Executive Director of Sports Information, which means he doesn’t really get paid to opine about politics around here.  Of course, he is a bear.  Bears can be very dangerous at times; don’t let that cuddly loveable teddy bear exterior fool you!!!  So if Aloysius wants to opine about politics I generally don’t try to stop him.  Thankfully he doesn’t get the urge very often.  But every now and then he perks up when something mildly entertaining comes across the wire, like this cheesy takeoff on the movie “Rudy” by congressional candidate Dan Adler out in California:

–Speaking of crazy people out in California:  You thought we were done with Harold Camping?  Not so fast, my friends!!!!!  Camping is still out there, doing his thing.  He has only slightly changed his tune; he now says that the May 21 thing was a “silent judgment” and a purely spiritual event.  But never fear, the end of the world is still on for October 21.

October 21.  My birthday.  That’s going to be one HELL of a birthday!!!!!

Dude, if I were you right now I would shut the hell up and get the hell out of the limelight and find the biggest rock I can possibly crawl under and hide out there for as long as I can get away with.  Because if October 22 rolls around and we’re all still here, I don’t think it’s going to go very well for you.  I’m just sayin.

–If and when the Rapture does happen, don’t worry.  Your pooch or kitty or other animal will be well provided for, thanks to the good people over at Eternal Earth-Bound Pets.  For a reasonable fee, they guarantee that should the Rapture occur at any time within the next ten years your pets will be rescued and cared for.  Of course all of the people who work for them are atheists–it wouldn’t work out very well for them if any of their rescuers got raptured, now would it?

–What would a tragic tornado strike  be without Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist peeps putting in an appearance and making their opinion known?  “Thank God for 125 Dead in Joplin”, we read on the Westboro Baptist website this week.  They are planning to protest President Obama’s visit to Joplin this Sunday.  (Of course this event will have already happened by the time this post goes live.  So we shall see how it all turned out, shan’t we?)