The Monday Melange 05.02.11: More MARTA Crazies, Osama Bin Laden, Harvey Updyke

Aloysius, our Executive Director of Sports Information, wants you to know that he claims full credit for the slaying of Osama Bin Laden. Don't be fooled by that cuddly, loveable teddy bear exterior. He is a bear.

–Aloysius, our Executive Director of Sports Information here at Everyone’s Entitled to Joe’s Opinion, has been busy lately.  If you’ve been reading the news lately, you know that Osama Bin Laden is dead.  Imagine that:  it took a teddy bear to do what the FBI and the CIA have been unable to do for two decades plus.

Don’t be fooled by that cuddly, loveable teddy bear exterior, people.  Aloysius is a bear, and bears can be quite dangerous.

Aloysius is also claiming responsibility for the recent attack upon Harvey Updyke, the Auburn tree poisoner.  Folks, I’ve been trying to tell you that bears can be extremely dangerous.

–Still don’t think we have crazies on MARTA?  I offer the following as proof:  A couple of weeks back, a man grabbed some paper towels off a maintenance cart at the Ashby MARTA station, and used them to blow his nose.  This set in motion a chain of events that ended with him in jail.

I told you we have our fair share of crazies that use our public transportation system.

Maybe Aloysius could get out there and dispense some ursine justice on MARTA.  He would definitely have his work cut out for him.