The Monday Melange 12.28.09: Aggie Jokes, Lindsay Lohan, Kanye West

–Just wondering:  Why does Lindsay Lohan waste so much time and money and effort with rehab every 6 months or thereabouts when we all know she is going to go right back to her old tricks?  Seems that she would do much better to just accept who she is and apply for a job as a go-go dancer at one of the clubs she frequents.  She might as well; her acting career isn’t exactly going anywhere these days.  Neither is her singing career.

–Wouldn’t it do your heart good to see Kanye West get punk’d?  Here you are:

–As a Georgia fan I don’t get this opportunity very often, seeing as Georgia doesn’t play Texas A&M very often, so I am going to make the most of this.

How many Aggies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?  Five–one to hold the bulb and four to turn the house.

These two Aggies were walking on Bourbon Street when they saw a sign in one of the shops which said “Caribbean Cruises–$50”.  They went inside to check it out and paid the man their $50.  The man hit them over the head with a baseball bat, shoved them into an inner tube, and pushed them out into the Industrial Canal.  They floated down the river and out into the Gulf of Mexico.  Long about lunchtime the next day, they finally came to.  One Aggie said to the other, “Man I’m hungry.  Do they serve lunch on this cruise?”  The other Aggie said, “No, they didn’t last year.”

Texas A&M tried to start a water polo team, but they had to give it up because the horses drowned.

Did you hear about the Aggie who tried to make pineapple upside-down cake?  First he tried to turn the oven over.

How about the two Aggies who tried to go skiing but had to give up because they couldn’t get the boat up the mountain?

Or the skeleton that they just found in a closet of one of the dorm rooms?  It was the 1968 hide-and-go-seek champion.