The Monday Melange 11.16.09: Mack Brown, Bacarri Rambo, Lane Kiffin

–Mack Brown once told a story while speaking at a civic luncheon.  When he first started at North Carolina, the outgoing coach gave him three envelopes numbered 1-3, and instructed him to open them one at a time, in order, whenever he got in trouble, and do whatever the contents of the envelope instructed him to do.  Well, his first year at North Carolina did not go very well, and the fans and alumni were howling.  He opened envelope number 1, and inside was a slip of paper which said, “Blame your predecessor.”  So he went out on the speaking circuit and talked about how the previous coach had messed up all the recruiting, how it would take some time but he would get it all straightened out.

Sure enough, North Carolina did better the next year, and every year after that through the late 80s and into the early 90s.  But in 1993 they had a down year, and again the fans were howling.  He opened envelope number 2, and inside was a slip of paper which said, “Fire some assistants.”  So he fired several assistants at the end of the season.  The next year North Carolina was much improved, and went on to become a Top 10 program through the mid 90s.  At the end of the 1997 season, Texas came calling and Mack Brown left to take that job.  When he got to Austin and finished unpacking, he found the third envelope, which he had never opened.  Just for curiosity, he opened it.  Inside was a slip of paper which said, “Prepare three envelopes.”

By my reckoning, Mark Richt is now on envelope number 2.

–Bacarri Rambo:  Talk about taking one for the team!!!

–I know that injury to Bacarri Rambo looked very scary.  But think about this:  There once was a time when people actually died from football injuries.  In 1906 there was a huge public outcry and a strong move afoot to actually ban the game of football because 71 people had died from football-related injuries in the previous five years.  Sweeping rule changes were made and the game was saved.  Now when’s the last time you heard of anybody dying from a football-related injury?

–A couple of things that struck me about that Mack Brown story:  First of all, the “Prepare three envelopes” instruction inside the third envelope.  In other words, “If you’ve managed to get in trouble three times, there’s nothing you or anybody else can do to help you.  You might as well just go on and get your house in order, and prepare three envelopes for the next guy.”  Next, it is very funny to think that for all these years there has been a chain letter being passed down among the head coaches at North Carolina (until Mack Brown broke the chain by not preparing his three envelopes for the next guy).

–Earlier this year, you will no doubt recall that Lane Kiffin got into a little bit of trouble for calling out Urban Meyer as a cheater.  Nu’Keese Richardson of Pahokee, Florida (located on the eastern shore of Lake Okeechobee, about 30 miles west of West Palm Beach and 90 miles northwest of downtown Miami), was at Tennessee on a recruiting visit.  Urban Meyer called him on his cell phone during this visit.  Lane Kiffin claimed that it is a recruiting violation to attempt to contact a prospect while he is on another school’s campus (it isn’t) and made the comment “I love the fact that Urban had to cheat and still didn’t get him” while speaking at a booster function.  When news of these remarks reached the SEC commissioner’s office, Lane Kiffin was hit with a reprimand.  Here is the video of Lane Kiffin’s offending remarks:

Well, it turns out that Nu’Keese Richardson, Lane Kiffin’s prize recruit who got him in so much trouble, is not even on the team anymore.  Last week Nu’Keese Richardson and a couple of other players were involved in an attempted robbery outside a convenience store in Knoxville.  All three players were suspended from the Ole Miss game this weekend.  Nu’Keese Richardson and Mike Edwards were kicked off the team today, and the third player is on indefinite suspension.

As the fan of a team that was completely and totally punked by Lane Kiffin in his first year of coaching, I have nothing whatsoever to say to him.  But I will not let that stop me.  After all, I am a Georgia fan.  Georgia fans are known the world over for talking smack about rivals, even when they have no place whatsoever to be doing so.  That is a big part of the reason why there is not much love for Georgia outside of the Bulldog Nation.  So as a Georgia fan, I will uphold my school’s fan base’s reputation for obnoxiousness and ask:  So what does Lane Kiffin have to say now?  Hmmmm???